REAL Success From AcmNotes These are notes taken by Brian Wiese while attending the "REAL Success" Leadership talk by John Maxwell ( on May 9th, 2005 at the Qwest Center. The conference was setup by Omaha's Advanced Leadership Network ( and admission cost as covered by PKI to a few students, including myself. Ihad to leave the conference early at lunch, so please feel free to make contributions and edits to these notes if you attended as well, or if you just feel you have something to contribute. Thanks. REAL Success dependent upon: Relationships, Equipping, Attitude, Leadership Table of contents 1 Introductions to Success 1.1 Finding Purpose, Maximize Potential 1.2 Focus on Strength Zone 1.3 Skills Are From 1-10 1.4 2 Questions Determine Success 1.5 Success Quotes and Thoughts 2 Secret of Success - Daily Habits 2.1 Decision Management 2.2 Developing Daily Habits 3 Relationships 3.1 5 Levels of Relationship 3.2 Some Relationship Principles 4 Equipping Your Team 4.1 Parents Investment in Reading 5 Attitude 6 Leadership [edit] Introductions to Success [edit] Finding Purpose, Maximize Potential * Find your passion and purpose in life o The enegizer of your life, what gives you energy? You never see someone with "high energy" who isn't passionate about what they are doing. o Follow your heart, if you could do anything, what would that be that energizes you? o What are your gifts? What do you do well? o Find your strengths zone. o Successful people have found what they are good at - and do that - their "niche" * Grow to your maximal potential in your purpose o Develop a personal growth plan. o Growth is not automatic, only by purposeful investment * Sew seeds that benefit others [edit] Focus on Strength Zone In the areas of your skills - from this day forward - don't work on your weaknesses! Why? ... because you're weak! Work on your strengths. * Communicator: one who makes things simple * Educator: one who makes simple things complicated (laugh!) (If you're not confused, they're not educating enough!) John Maxwell is a 'communicator' and your 'friend', here to help, provide advice and explain simply how to get to success. For example, if you got an "A" in Math, and a "C" in English... typical response would be "you need to work on your english, and bring this grade up - your weakness". While maybe you were lucky even to get a "C", you deserved a "D" - the teacher just liked you! Instead work hard on that A... like Einstein or any other successful person (besides rare 'renaissance men/women'), focus on a specialized topic to exceed in. [edit] Skills Are From 1-10 We all have strengths and weakeness in different skills, this makes us unique. We have to identify what these strengths and weaknesses are. No matter where you are on the scale from (worst) 1-10 (best), you'll probably only move 2-3 places at most in your life. If you are a 2 now, at best you'll be a 4. If a 7 now, may be a 9 or 10 by working on strengths. People pay for the "best", you'll get the job by being the "best" and not mediocre. People stand in line for a "9", not a "3". * skills 1-10 scale * only move 2-3 places in life o weak to mediocre, vs mediocre to great * go for a 9 or 10, for success Businesses find strengths in their products and services, what people will pay for. Leaders look for strengths in their people, develop leaders in their company. Tiger wood's strength is golf, may practice on his drive (a weakness in his strengths zone). * Don't spend life working on weaknesses (at best average) * Work on the weaknesses in your strengths zone (leads to perfection) [edit] 2 Questions Determine Success 1. Are you investing in yourself? (determines how much you will grow by next year) 2. How much are you investing in others? [edit] Success Quotes and Thoughts * Those closest to you - your innercircle - determine how you grow and develop - from John Maxwell's "21 Laws of Leadership" * Only automatic thing is death. 2 great days: 1) being born 2) discovering why * Sew seeds that benefit others - not living just for self. Living beyond self. The entire universe is composed of others - that is life. [edit] Secret of Success - Daily Habits * Success is determined by our daily agenda o No single event - or time/place that determines our success or failure o Attitude - how we interact in life daily (the good and bad) o Prioritize Life - what is important? From John's book the "Daily Dozen", set 12 paths to growth to work on every day * Exaggerate yesterday "good ol' days" or "I'll never do that again" * Overestimate tomorrow * Underestimate today Remember: "Yesterday ended last night" [edit] Decision Management * Successful people make important decisions early, and manage them the rest of their life o Hardest decisions to manage, are those made latest in life o no longer need to make the decision, just manage it o emphasis is falsely on decision making instead of management o day-to-day management (be faithful to wife, be ethical) o Ex: News years resolution, to workout. Gyms packed 1st week of January, 2nd week all open. 78% of new years resolutions are broken within 10 days. 10 of John's 12 Decisions to Manage daily (kept on note card): 1. choose and display the right attitude 2. determine and act upon priorities 3. healthy guidelines 4. live out faith 5. care for family 6. keep promises 7. develop good thinking 8. manage finances 9. invest in solid relationships 10. seek and experience improvement [edit] Developing Daily Habits * Read book "Daily Dozen" and rank 1-12 the decisions you want to focus on every day o Develop daily healthy habits o Spend 1 month on each to Develop the Habit + Alternate focusing on the easy and the hard ones + 1st month focusing on #1, 2nd month on #12, 3rd month on #2, etc.. o Spend that year, and all subsequent to manage the decisions John Maxwell, a communicator and friend, a teacher to enable us. A [edit] Relationships * Winning in all areas of life begins by winning with people * Relationships make us or break us * To go along, must get along * Book: Winning With People by John Maxwell * 70% of people lack relationship training * Can trace success and failure to relationships in our lives o Best Days made by the people around you, same for the worst * Hope of getting anyone back in a relationship, is "unconditional love" * Invest in relationships/people o 87% people, 13% product defines Success by Stanford research [edit] 5 Levels of Relationship 1. Readiness (Am I ready for a relationship with someone else, or should stay single?) 2. Connection (Am I willing to focus on others?) 3. Trust (Can I build mutual trust?) 4. Investment (Am I willing to invest in others, giving to them? Applies to businesses too) 5. Synergy (Can I create a win-win relationship? successful mergers) [edit] Some Relationship Principles * Lens - Who we are determines how we see others. o We don't see people as they are - only as we are in comparison. Through our own strengths and weaknesses. If I am a trusting person, I will trust others. (Groucho Marx - "I don't want to belong to any club that would accept me as a member") o To build good relationships - work on self before others. 50% of problem is self. * Bob - If Bob has a problem with everyone, Bob is the problem. o "No matter where you go, there you are" o Trouble getting along with people o Destination Disease - if I can just move somewhere, get a promotion, etc... somewhere else things are better * Pain - Hurting people hurt people, and are easily hurt by people o Watching how people hurt each other. o Question not "Why are they doing it?" but rather "What is going on in their life?" o 1/4 of people are dysfunctional o Like a "splinter in one's soul", people may over-react to something. Just like they'll pull away quickly if splinter is in their hand and you start to handshake. * Hammer - Never use a hammer to swat a fly of someone's forehead o Response to overreacting o Don't let the situation become more important/larger that the relationship, relationship will go bad o "I'm your friend here" response when other is using hammer, remember that o John was dumb, thought the goal of an argument was to win! Stupid man. (And thought was entitled to victory as well... Touchdown!) + Was winning the arguments but loosing love with wife from using the "Hammer". + Timeout - "I'm your friend", "I'm on your team" + On the couch, would hold hands and "squeeze" to signify "stop using hammer" when disciplining children * Elevator - Some people lift you up, some people bring you down o There are lifters and leaners. o Love to be around the lifters: add value to people, push their buttons and they always take you up o Hide from the leaners: subtract value from people, only 1 button - DOWN, always a LOWER basement. + Most don't know they are leaners * Exchange - Perspective. Instead of putting others in their place, put yourself in their place. (most important) o We judge ourselves by our intentions and others by their actions + others work always will look worse, and ours the best o We do a thorough job while others take a long time o We are always busy and others simply lazy o We take the initiative while others tend to step over bounds o We feel deserved of rewards for our work while others get all the breaks o Howto Address Mistake of Leading by Assumption + Sports coach had team record on markerboard at halftime what their successes were and losses in 1st half, then 3 ways to make improvement in 2nd half + Coach would then come in later, evaluate their own understandings, and offer comments on them with praise and criticism + Ask Questions -> Get on the same Page 1. Find them so that you can then 2. Lead them [edit] Equipping Your Team * Leaders who appropriately equip their team possess an edge that helps them achieve greatness * People don't care how much you know until they know how much you care * There is no success without a successor * Care for and pour yourself into other people * Practice the 30 second rule o In the 1st 30 seconds of meeting someone, compliment them, encourage them o make them a lifter in your life [edit] Parents Investment in Reading * Parents never paid John to do chores o Not paid to do something involved with being part of the family o When born, already owe mother 9 months of room and board! o We all do things for each other. Put money into values * 30 minutes of reading daily, paid by Dad o Paid to Read o Dad asked kids to discuss what they read today at dinner o Read all the classics by high school * Books they read changed their lives - him and all brothers+sisters very successful in life * Defined the home they grew up in, their Daily Habits [edit] Attitude * Learn how making small changes in yoru attitude can help you and your entire team pass the endurance test with flying colors [edit] Leadership * Everything rises and falls on your ability to lead. Find out how small leadership steps can pay huge dividends.

notes/realsuccess.txt · Last modified: 2006/05/08 07:55 by bw
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